101 Short Funny Quotes and Sayings with Pictures

Experiencing problems and melancholy is inevitable in life. Sometimes, short funny quotes can help up loosen up a bit. Here we have collected short funny quotes and sayings which can help you be happier and help you feel better. First in line is a compilation of inspirational and funny quotes from movies. If you are a fan of Spider Man, you may be familiar with these quotes.

Inspirational Funny Quotes from Movies

1. Do, or do not. There is no “try”. – Yoda, from Star Wars

2. You can’t live your life for other people. You’ve got to do what’s right for you, even if it hurts some people you love. – from The Notebook

3. Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. – Ferris, from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

4. Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want. – Heath Ledger, from 10 Things I Hate About You

5. To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, to draw closer, to find each other and to feel. That is the purpose of life.” – from The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

6. Oh yes, the past can hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it. – Rafiki, from The Lion King

7. You cannot live your life to please others. The choice must be yours. – White Queen, from Alice in Wonderland

8. Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out? – from What a Girl Wants

9. My momma always said, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.” – from Forrest Gump

10. I don’t regret the things I’ve done, but those I did not do. – from Empire Records

11. After a while, you learn to ignore the names people call you and just trust who you are. – from Shrek

12. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. – from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

13. It’s what you do right now that makes a difference. – from Black Hawk Down

14. It is not our abilities that show what we truly are… it is our choices. – Dumbledore, from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

15. Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss. – from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

16. Great men are not born great, they grow great. – Mario Puzo, from The Godfather

17. Love cannot be found where it doesn’t exist, nor can it be hidden where it truly does. – David Schwimmer, from Kissing a Fool

18. Only if you find peace within yourself will you find true connection with others. – from Before Sunrise

19. To find something, anything, a great truth or a lost pair of glasses, you must first believe there will be some advantage in finding it. – from All the King’s Men

20. I know what I have to do now, I’ve got to keep breathing because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring? – from Cast Away

Short and Funny Quotes about Life

21. The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

22. All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.

23. I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because I’m still looking for ideas.

24. Life is a bitch so learn how to fuck it.

25. They laugh at me because I’m different; I laugh at them because they’re all the same.

26. I’m always on my best behavior. It just so happens that my best behavior isn’t very good.

27. My idea of a good morning is one when I open my eyes, take a deep breath then go back to sleep.

28. Life is too short to worry about what others say or think about you. So have fun, enjoy and give them something to talk about.

29. Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth,

30. Some people aren’t just missing the odd screw. The whole freakin’ tool box is gone.

31. Just because I give you advice, it doesn’t mean I know more than you, it just means I’ve done more stupid shit.

32. Life is a onetime offer, use it well.

33. When I count my blessings, I count you twice.

34. Some people just need a high-five in the face with a chair.

35. Scientist say the universe is made up of protons, electrons and neutrons. They forget to mention morons.

36. Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome not perfect.

37. Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.

38. I would challenge you to a battle of wits but I see you are unarmed.

39. Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else’s path unless you are in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. By all means, you should follow that.

40. Life without God is like an un-sharpened pencil – No point.

Short and Funny Quotes about Friends

41. My level of maturity depends on who I’m with.

42. We’re not cavemen. We have technology.

43. My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do.

44. My attitude will always be based on how you treat me.

45. True friends don’t judge each other. They judge people together.

46. Know that bitches get stuff done.

47. I hope we’re friends until we die. Then I howpe we stat ghost friends and walk through walls and scare the shit out of people.

48. A T-rex has short arms so that everything it holds is close to its heart.

49. I may not be the most important person in your life. I just hope when you hear my name, you smile and say that’s my friend.

50. I am who I am. You approval is not needed.

51. You cannot act like flip flops and expect to be treated like louboutins.

52. May you never go to hell but always be on your way.

53. I never said I hated you. I just said that if you were on fire, I might consider roasting a marshmallow. Big difference.

54. You can’t make everybody happy. You aren’t a jar of nutella.

55. I stay fat because it just wouldn’t be fair to all the thin people is I were this good-looking, intelligent, funny and thin. It’s a public service really.

56. There there, it’s gonna be OK. Hey, I know this is a bad time and all but my water dish has been empty like all day. No rush, just saying.

57. Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.

58. I think its funny that people who treat you like shit get offended when you finally do the same to them.

59. I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

60. That awkward moment when you’re doing weird stuff, then realize someone is watching you.

Short and Funny Quotes about Family

61. Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.

62. Family are like underpants, some crawl up your ass, some get a little sideways, some are your favorite, some are holy, some are cheap, and just plain nasty, and some actually cover your ass when you need them to.

63. You don’t know what you have until it’s gone. For example, toilet paper.

64. We are all mature until somebody brings out some bubble wrap.

65. Home is wherever my bunch if crazies are.

66. Our family is just one tent away from a full-blown circus.

67. There is a legend that is you go take a shower as screams out loud “Mom!” three times, a nice lady appears bringing the towel you forgot.

68. When I’m quiet, those that don;t know me look at me and think I’m shy. People who know me think, OMG! Shes Thinking! Everyone run for your life.

69. I smile because you’re my family. I laugh because there is nothing your can do about it.

70. I shook my family tree and a bunch of nuts fell out.

71. You are going to be fine, you come from a strong line of lunatics.

72. We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

73. The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”

74. I thought you were never ever ever ever coming home ever so I panicked.

75. In my family, crazy doesn;’t skip a generation

76. You and I are sisters. Always remember that if you fall I will pick you up as soon as I finish laughing.

77. I don’t have a short temper. I just have a quick reaction to bullshit.

78. The best thing about me. I’m limited edition. There are no other copies. Bet you’re thinking thank the good lord.

79. Two old people sitting on a bench, once turns to the other and says ‘My butt fell asleep.’ The other says, ‘Yep, I heard it snore a couple of times.

80. I think the cuckoo just fell out of your clock.

Short and Funny Quotes about Love

81. I’ve been single for a while and I have to say, it’s going very well, like it’s working out. I think I’m the one.

82. Were all a little weird, and life’s a little weird. And when we find someone  whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall a mutual weirdness and call it Love.

83. Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’r CuTe.

84. You text him. he doesn’t text back. He was obviously excited that he fainted.

85. Of course women don;t work as hard as men. They get it right the first time.

86. I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then wall into a pole.

87. Good relationships don’t just happen. They take patience, time and two people who truly want to be together.

88.  I tripped and fell into some feelings. I’m OK now. I brushed that shit off.

89. Follow your brain. Your heart is stupid as shit.

90. Are you google? Because you have everything I’m searching for.

91. The only time a woman is helpless is when her nail polish is drying. Other than that, watch out.

92. Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

93. I didn’t want to fall in love, not at all but at some point, you smiled and holy shit I blew it.

94. From the moment we started talking I knew that I wanted you around.

95. I’m bananas for you. Let’s never split.

96. If she likes you, she’ll tackle you, sing to you, be weird around you, dance for you, scream at you, take your food and be mean to you.

97. I hope your day is as nice as your butt.

98. I have a date tonight with my bed. We are totally gonna sleep together.

99. Love is like fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.

100. Marry the one who gives you the same feeling you get when you see food coming at a restaurant.

101.

Sometimes a little enjoyment is all we need to experience joy. If you feel these compiled short funny quotes  about life, love, friends and family are not enough, you may read about lovely wedding quotes, sexy love quotes and quotes about life and love.  You can also get inspired by reading our teamwork quotes.